 [Blog] Working 9-5 - Ramblings About Gambling and Long-Winded Betting TipsWritten by SE1blue on Friday, 28th Oct 2011 17:26 Since we got together my girlfriend has taken me by surprise on several occasions; once in Thetford Forest, another time in a box at the theatre, and way too many times for the backseat of a Daewoo Lacetti. Those were the days! But the honeymoon period is what it is and now Santa opens my eyes me more regularly than she does. But last Sunday, my other half probably gave me my best ever ‘O face’. “Why don’t you have a go at being a professional gambler?†“Huh?†“You’re off work this week. Why don’t you get out of the flat and try being a professional gambler?†“Huh?†“You know, see if you can make what you earn in a week blowing some cash down at the casino, betting shop or wherever?†“Huh?†Whilst I pulled my chin back up to my face she laid out the rules. I had to make £500 in a week, with a budget of £50 to spend per day for five days. I felt this was a little tight considering I was expected to make double my budget, but when someone offers you cake, you don’t say “That’s a bit thin!â€. Despite my ‘licence to gamble’ I was nervous about the week ahead. My tips on TWTD for the last couple of weeks haven’t added much to my Caribbean Bunny Mansion retirement fund (although I did call the Norwich result at Anfield). But, with nothing else to do during half-term, except dodge the Hoover and laundry, I twisted my own arm into accepting the challenge. It was agreed that I could start the gambling week on the Tuesday, as nothing really happens on a Monday, and I had a steaming hangover thanks to my new Downton Abbey drinking game, which basically involves opening a can of Guinness every time it gets boring. Simple, but effective. I woke up on Tuesday with a different feeling about the day of work ahead of me – I think they call it optimism. I clocked in at work at 11am at a Leicester Square casino and pushed £50 into a roulette machine. A couple of minutes later a blonde-haired waitress called Elena, who I noticed was wearing a white shirt a couple of sizes too small, came over and asked me if I would like to order a drink. I remembered I was now self-employed and ordered a pint of Guinness. Gambling is thirsty work. Around lunchtime, as she brought over my second pint, Elena raised an eyebrow at the winnings I had in my machine. Possibly sensing a larger tip she asked me why I pick the numbers I do. I’ve heard this question a million times from a million different waitresses so thought I’d jazz-up my answer seeing as I was now a professional gambler. “Well, I pick 8 because that’s the number of times I have to switch the lights on and off before I leave the house. 17 is how many times I’ve watched Taxi Driver, and 33 is the number of moles I have on my body.†Elena didn’t serve me any more drinks after that and avoided me until a guy called Geoff came on shift and then he spent his afternoon giving me weird looks in the mirror behind the bar. Nevertheless, it turned out 17 was my lucky number on Tuesday and landed me £329 in the space of a few hours. On my first day I had made £279 profit. On Wednesday, I went to the bookies and thought I’d invest some cash on the greyhounds. Things started really well as I bet £5 on Droopy’s Twilight in the 4.47 at Hove at 2/1. Droopy won me £10 profit. I decided to stick with cartoon dogs and put £5 on Lil Scrappy in the 4.57 at Hove who also won at 2/1. I was £20 up when I put another fiver on Bad Bad Lad in the 5.07 at Hove which won at 4/1. Before I left William Hill, I put £20 on Birmingham to draw with Leeds at 11/5. I then popped into the off licence next door and bought five Euromillions tickets. Birmingham beat Leeds but I won a whopping £2.40 on the Euromillions, so finished the day with a £12.40 profit. My total winnings for the week totalled £301.40. On Thursday, things went a little bit wrong. The girlfriend and I went to see The Mousetrap in the West End with a bottle of wine. We had a very nice meal afterwards, with a bottle of wine. We went to the casino in Leicester Square, where we had a bottle of wine, and I lost £70 (I went over budget) faster than you can say “boo!†to a drinks waitress or something equally unnerving. My income for the week went down to £241.40. I decided to call in sick to work today, as I was actually sick (four times!), and only just managed to get myself to Starbucks for an iced coffee and the unsympathetic ear of a cashier. On my way back to the flat I popped into the off licence and bought another £10 of Euromillions tickets. I also put the following bets on the weekend’s football from my Saturday budget. I have placed £10 on each bet with the potential winnings listed beneath them. My profit for the week currently stands at £181.40 Draw Doubles Wigan v Fulham Leeds v Cardiff Accumulator Please report offensive, libellous or inappropriate posts by using the links provided.
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